No More Masks (from David)

David sent me this blog post. It is dated November 1, 2009.

David writes:

Halloween got me thinking about how much I hid behind masks throughout my life. From my early days I tried to be the smart kid and the funny kid. As a teenager I was the fun-loving druggie. In my 20's I was the recovery guru. In my 30's I was the PR guy. And most recently I was the Senior Vice President, director, successful guy. What did all of these have in common? They were totally focused on the outward perception. Superficial masks. They all hid the shame and disgrace I felt deep in my heart.

Today, through the grace of God, I've been stripped of all those masks, and the shame they hid. I'm able today to look my wife in the eyes without turning in shame. I'm able to face my family and friends. I will always regret my actions and their consequences on the child pornography victims, my wife, family, and everyone impacted. But I have been freed from the cycle of shame that perpetuated my addiction, and now have a chance to live mask-free. I don't always like what I see, but I know I have the opportunity to grow and help myself and those around me for this I am eternally grateful.

God bless,
David