The 1,200-second Relationship (from David)

David sent me this blog post. It is dated October 23, 2009.

David writes:

Lisa and I talk to each other for about 20 minutes every day. We do two 10-minute calls as the phones here only give you 10 minutes per call. Each call costs about $6.00. Not that cost is important, but I thought I would throw it out there for context.

The first 10-15 minutes we spend updating each other on the last 24 hours or so. The last 5-10 minutes we try to talk about more substantive topics. So we are trying to maintain, and continue to improve our relationship in 10-minute increments. Needless to say this is a challenge.

Both of us are hesitant to burden the other with any negative feelings. I know I don't want to give Lisa any more to worry about. And she says she doesn't want me to have to deal with anything negative on my own in jail.

During our 20-minute in-person visit today we talked about being open and honest about our fears, resentments and other feelings. No more masks. This is how we lived before - hiding our feelings so we wouldn't have to face them or each other. That's part of what kept us sick. We agreed that for the benefit of our relationship and sanity, we will be open and honest. We're going to treat those 20 minutes as precious. As an opportunity to strengthen our marriage - 1,200 seconds at a time.

God bless,
David