It's all about me?

One of the primary symptoms of addiction is extreme self-centeredness. My acting out was all about pleasing me, running from my problems (most of which I created), ignoring the needs of my wife, not thinking about how my actions were hurting others. The only thing greater than me was my addiction.

Recovery is all about letting go of self, turning to a higher power and others to fill that hole inside us. The first step is admitting we were powerless over our sexual addiction and that our life was unmanageable. You wouldn't think that would be too difficult for someone like me who was looking at pornography up to 12 hours each day, looking at child pornography, potentially losing my marriage, not performing at work, telling lies daily, not having any truly close friends, ignoring the fact that there are victims of child pornography, and facing significant federal prison time. But we define insanity as doing the same things and expecting different results. I more than met that definition.

Since starting recovery and treatment I have gotten a glimpse of what a God-centered life is like. I'm more likely to think about the impact my actions have on others. I care how others are feeling and want to do what I can to lift them up, not tear them down like I use to.

What freedom to be unshackled from self.

God bless,
David