Sadness...

This week we found out that David's court date is September 14 to accept his plea before the judge. The judge that we have been assigned is in Greenville, NC. At this court date, the judge will determine if David will get a pre-trial release (meaning he will be released on bond until his sentencing). If he does not get a pre-trial release, he will be arrested on the spot, and put in jail until his sentencing. I am very sad.

When I got married, I took oath for better or for worse. I could not imagine "the worse", but here it is. I am trying to imagine my life without my husband, and I cannot. I know I will be ok, but it's sad to think of life without him. We all have our issues, and have things about ourselves that we would like to change. My husband is such a great guy. He is a kind guy, thoughtful and gentle. Yes, he has done a bad thing. He has accepted full responsibility for what he has done. He is making changes in his life to beat this addiction that has changed our lives forever. For as awful of a nightmare as the last 8 months have been, I could not have asked for a better husband. He is there for me in ways I had always wanted him to be. We are connecting, sharing, talking, loving.

David is worried about me, an I am worried about him. We are trying to be strong, but we cannot be all of the time. These last few days have been very difficult. The reality is setting in that David is going to prison. We don't know for how long, but he is going. I don't like thinking about it as we try to enjoy the little bit of time we have left. At the same time, it's hard to be happy and enjoy each other without the sadness setting in. I know god has a plan, but I question it sometimes. I wonder where we are headed and why. We are still working on out initiative, and want so much to help others in this same situation. I want to offer support and help as we could not have gotten through these last eight months without the support of our family and friends. We have met some of the best and most compassionate people in our support groups. They are trully some of the best people we have met in a long time. I hope this blog and our initiative helps anyone in this situation.